OSAMA EXPLAINS:
Correctly read, it's a simple question of who started the hostilities. Answer: America & Israel & the crusaders. It is thus permissible to declare Jihad against them, because they started it! In this sense, Allah may be likened to an omniscient 3rd grade schoolteacher named Mr. Keplinger and America to the disruptive student in the back of the room. We are honored to act as the glorious ruler of Allah, which swats soundly the bare bottom of the infidel!